Blessed C. Bagor

I rarely talk about my struggles with speech disfluency in person.

Growing up, I experienced frequent stammering, sometimes having so much to say but unable to express it clearly.

This has been a part of my life since childhood, though I only understood it as a medical condition called speech disfluency much later.

Childhood Struggles

During my elementary years, I often felt embarrassed because my classmates and peers would tease me about my speech.

At the time, I thought I just spoke too fast, causing me to stammer. I didn’t realize there was more to it.

My family—even my cousins and aunts—would tease me too, making arguments particularly difficult since I couldn’t express myself well.

Feeling misunderstood and frustrated, I turned to writing as my outlet.

Writing allowed me to share my thoughts and ideas without the pressure of speaking fluently.

High School and Beyond

In high school, I still didn’t know much about speech disfluency because I had never visited a speech-language pathologist.

The teasing and stigma persisted, and during arguments or discussions, I often found myself at a loss for words.

One particularly embarrassing experience occurred after high school, during a scholarship interview.

I failed the interview because of my speech difficulties.

But I thought that time was only because of the stigma some people from Metro Manila had towards those from the provinces, like Visayas or Mindanao.

In college, I continued to struggle during discussions and report presentations.

Speaking fluently was a challenge, and my reports often came across as bad or boring.

Yet, I pushed myself to participate and open my mouth, even if it was difficult.

Post-Pandemic and Personal Growth

After the COVID-19 pandemic, I spent much of my time working on a farm, living in solitude and speaking to people rarely.

When I applied for a job, my initial interview was challenging.

I could barely get my words out, but thankfully, the company’s CEO saw my potential and technical skills, allowing me to prove myself.

Since then, I’ve been working to overcome my speech difficulties.

I practice speaking regularly, reminding myself that progress comes with persistence.

Practical Tips to Improve Communication Skills

Whether you have speech disfluency or not, improving communication skills is a journey that requires patience and consistent effort.

Here are some strategies that have helped me and might help you:

1. Practice Regularly: Repetition builds confidence. Start by speaking out loud to yourself, then gradually move to small conversations with trusted friends or family members.
2. Record Yourself: Hearing yourself speak can help you identify areas for improvement and track your progress over time.
3. Slow Down: Speaking slowly can reduce the pressure to rush through your thoughts. Pausing gives you time to organize your ideas.
4. Join a Support Group or Club: Groups like Toastmasters can provide a supportive environment to practice public speaking.
5. Use Writing as a Tool: If you struggle to say something out loud, try writing it down first. Writing can help you organize your thoughts before speaking.
6. Seek Professional Help: Consulting a speech-language pathologist can provide tailored techniques and exercises for your specific needs.
7. Be Kind to Yourself: Overcoming speech challenges is not easy. Celebrate small victories and remind yourself that progress takes time.

Final Thoughts

Living with speech disfluency has been a significant challenge, but it has also taught me resilience and creativity.

While I still have moments where I struggle, I’ve learned to keep pushing forward.

For anyone facing similar difficulties, know that you are not alone.

With practice, patience, and the right support, it is possible to improve your communication skills and share your voice with the world.

In his book Man Up, Bedros Keuilian talks about leadership, accountability, and high performance.

One idea that stands out is the concept of a “high-performance team.”

This type of team isn’t just skilled.

They share a mission, strive for excellence, and take responsibility for their success.

To build such a team, Keuilian says leaders need clarity.

The vision must be so clear that every member knows their role in making it happen.

High-performance teams rely on discipline, trust, and the ability to adapt.

They focus and work with intensity, which sets them apart.

This is something I’m working on—not just in building a team, but in becoming a high performer myself.

Keuilian uses a powerful analogy: be a fighter jet, not a crop duster.

A fighter jet is fast, agile, and built for impact.

It can handle tough missions with precision. A crop duster, on the other hand, is slow and limited.

While it serves a purpose, it can’t match the speed or capability of a fighter jet.

Right now, I’m more like a crop duster.

My days are often filled with distractions and tasks that don’t move me closer to my goals.

I’ve been playing it safe, staying in my comfort zone.

The focus and intensity of a fighter jet have been missing from my life.

But I’ve decided to change that.

The first step is defining my mission.

What do I really want to achieve?

Without a clear goal, I’ll keep drifting.

Next, I’ve started looking at how I spend my time. Am I focusing on the right things, or wasting energy on what doesn’t matter?

This self-check is tough but necessary.

I’m also paying attention to the people around me.

Keuilian says having the right team is key.

A fighter jet relies on its crew to succeed.

Similarly, I’m learning to distance myself from unhelpful influences and connect with those who challenge and inspire me.

Finally, becoming a fighter jet means embracing discomfort.

High performance requires sacrifice.

It means working through fear, fatigue, and self-doubt.

Discipline, not motivation, is what gets results.

Each time I choose discipline, I move closer to becoming a fighter jet.

One big decision I made to break out of my crop-duster mentality was to join the 1000-day content challenge.

I realized that to become the captain of my high-performance team, I needed to lead by example.

This challenge pushes me to show up daily, create consistently, and embrace the discomfort of growth.

It’s a commitment to excellence, accountability, and relentless improvement.

This journey isn’t easy. Some days, it’s tempting to stay in crop-duster mode.

But the rewards of becoming a high performer—for myself and those I lead—are worth it.

I’m committed to this transformation because it’s not just about success.

It’s about making an impact.

Here’s to leaving the crop duster behind and stepping into the fighter jet’s cockpit.

The climb is tough, but the view at the top will be worth it.

Many of us feel overwhelmed by the demands of daily life, and it can be hard to focus on what truly matters.

But what if there was a simple method to help you make real progress every day?

That’s where Robin Sharma’s 90/90/1 rule comes in.

Robin Sharma is a world-renowned author and leadership expert.

He’s famous for helping people unlock their potential.

One of his most powerful ideas is the 90/90/1 rule. It’s simple, clear, and it works.

What Is the 90/90/1 Rule?

The 90/90/1 rule is straightforward:

• For the next 90 days, spend the first 90 minutes of your workday focusing on your #1 most important task.

That’s it. Just one rule. But it can change everything.

Why Does It Work?

1. Focus Is Powerful: Most people start their day by checking emails, scrolling through social media, or doing small, easy tasks. But this scatters your energy. By using your best 90 minutes for your most important work, you set yourself up for success. You’re fresh, energized, and able to give your best effort.
2. Consistency Builds Momentum: Doing something every day for 90 days creates a habit. It also builds momentum, which makes it easier to keep going. Over time, this steady progress can lead to big results.
3. Eliminates Overwhelm: Instead of worrying about 10 different things, you focus on one. This reduces stress and makes your work feel manageable.

How to Apply the 90/90/1 Rule in Your Life

Here’s how you can make the 90/90/1 rule work for you:

1. Identify Your #1 Task: What’s the one thing that will make the biggest difference in your life or work? Maybe it’s writing a book, building your business, learning a new skill, or working on a project that’s been on your mind. Choose something meaningful—something that aligns with your goals.
2. Schedule Your 90 Minutes: Decide when your first 90 minutes of the day will be. For most people, it’s best to start right after waking up, as your mind is fresh. Avoid distractions during this time. Turn off notifications, close unnecessary tabs, and let your family or coworkers know you’re unavailable.
3. Stick to It: The magic of this rule is in the consistency. Do it every day, even if you’re tired, busy, or not in the mood. Some days might feel harder than others, but what matters is showing up.

Let’s say you’re an entrepreneur who wants to grow your business.

Your #1 task might be reaching out to potential clients or developing a new product.

By focusing on this for 90 minutes every day, you’ll make real progress.

Reflecting on the Impact of 90/90/1

The beauty of the 90/90/1 rule is its simplicity.

It cuts through the noise of modern life and helps you focus on what truly matters.

In a world filled with distractions, having a clear, simple plan can be life-changing.

This rule is not just about productivity—it’s about living intentionally.

It’s about choosing to spend your time on things that move you closer to your dreams.

When you follow the 90/90/1 rule, you’re not just working smarter; you’re also building discipline, confidence, and a sense of accomplishment.

You might have heard that it takes 21 days to form a habit. While this idea sounds encouraging, it’s not entirely accurate.

Research shows that creating a long-lasting habit usually takes 66 days.

This insight comes from a 2009 study published in the European Journal of Social Psychology, which revealed that habit formation varies widely from person to person, ranging from 18 to 254 days.

On average, though, it’s about 66 days.

What Makes Habits Stick?

Habits form when you repeatedly act in the same context until it becomes automatic.

This process takes time for several reasons:

1. Rewiring the Brain: Forming a habit involves creating new connections in your brain through repetition. This neural rewiring doesn’t happen overnight.
2. Breaking Old Patterns: It’s not just about starting something new—it’s also about overcoming resistance from old habits that feel familiar and comfortable.
3. Consistency Over Perfection: Building a habit isn’t about being perfect. It’s about being consistent enough for the behavior to feel natural over time.

From Victim to Hero

Robin Sharma’s teachings on The Victim to Hero Leap emphasize moving from a victim mindset to a hero mindset.

Here’s how this shift applies to building habits:

• A victim mindset might say, “I can’t stick to this; it’s too hard.”
• A hero mindset reframes this as, “This is challenging, but I can start small and keep improving.”

This proactive approach helps you take ownership of your actions and focus on growth rather than obstacles.

How to Build a Habit in 66 Days

Forming a habit requires self-leadership—the ability to guide yourself toward your goals.

Here’s how you can do it:

1. Set a Clear Goal: Decide on the habit you want to build and understand why it matters. A clear purpose keeps you motivated.
2. Start Small: Don’t overwhelm yourself. For example, begin with a 5-minute workout instead of an hour-long session. Gradually increase as you progress.
3. Track Your Progress: Use a habit tracker or journal to stay consistent. Visual reminders of your success reinforce the behavior.
4. Celebrate Wins: Reward yourself for milestones, no matter how small. This keeps you encouraged to continue.

Why Personal Growth Takes Time

Personal development is a journey, not a quick fix. Books like The Compound Effect by Darren Hardy and Atomic Habits by James Clear highlight the power of small, consistent actions.

These incremental steps lead to meaningful, lasting change.

When you commit to a habit for 66 days or more, you’re not just adopting a new behavior—you’re reshaping how you see yourself.

You become someone who values discipline, consistency, and improvement.

Key Takeaways

Building a habit takes time and effort, but the 66-day rule gives you a realistic timeline. Focus on consistent action and embrace the challenges as opportunities to grow. Each step you take moves you closer to becoming the best version of yourself. Stick with it—the results will be worth it.

In his book Atomic Habits, James Clear introduces a concept that resonates deeply with anyone striving for personal growth—the Valley of Disappointment.

This is the phase where the results of our efforts seem invisible, progress feels agonizingly slow, and frustration starts to creep in.

Despite the hard work we’ve put in, it feels like nothing is happening. It’s in this valley that many people give up, believing their efforts are in vain.

But if we understand this phenomenon and adjust our perspective, we can navigate through it and eventually see the fruits of our labor.

The Nature of the Valley of Disappointment

Imagine planting a seed.

For weeks, you water the soil, ensuring it gets enough sunlight and care.

Yet, nothing appears above the surface. This waiting period can feel like a failure—but beneath the soil, the seed is germinating, developing roots, and preparing to grow.

The Valley of Disappointment mirrors this process in our lives. It’s the gap between effort and visible results.

Clear explains that change doesn’t happen linearly. Instead, it follows what he calls the “plateau of latent potential.

“Early on, progress might be imperceptible because foundational work is being done beneath the surface.

It’s only when we persist long enough that we experience the breakthrough—the point when all those small, consistent actions lead to visible success.

Reflecting on Our Goals

Think about the goals you’re pursuing right now.

Are you trying to lose weight?

Build a business?

Learn a new skill?

It’s natural to expect quick wins. You put in the effort today and hope to see results tomorrow. But life rarely works that way.

If we give up too soon, we’ll never see what’s on the other side of the valley.

For example, consider someone trying to lose weight.

They’ve been exercising regularly and eating healthier for a month, but the scale hasn’t budged.

At this moment, it’s tempting to think, “What’s the point?” However, what’s happening behind the scenes—improved cardiovascular health, stronger muscles, better habits—isn’t visible yet.

Giving up now means abandoning the progress that’s been silently building.

Strategies to Climb Out of the Valley

So, how can we navigate the Valley of Disappointment and continue toward our goals?

1. Focus on Systems, Not Outcomes Clear emphasizes the importance of building effective systems rather than obsessing over specific outcomes. For instance, instead of setting a goal to “lose 10 pounds,” commit to a system of exercising three times a week and eating more vegetables. By focusing on the process, you’ll stay motivated even when results aren’t immediate.
2. Celebrate Small Wins Recognizing incremental progress can keep your morale high. Did you stick to your habit for a week? That’s a win. Did you learn a new technique or skill? Celebrate it. These small victories add up over time and keep you moving forward.
3. Reframe Your Expectations Accept that progress takes time and that setbacks are a normal part of the journey. Remind yourself that you’re building something meaningful and lasting, even if it’s not yet visible.
4. Track Your Habits Sometimes, progress is happening, but we fail to notice it. Keeping a log of your habits can provide evidence of growth, even when it feels slow. For example, journaling about your workouts or practice sessions can reveal patterns and improvements you might otherwise overlook.
5. Find Motivation in the Bigger Picture Reflect on why you started in the first place. Connecting with your deeper purpose can help you push through the tough moments. Whether it’s improving your health, achieving financial freedom, or creating something meaningful, your “why” is the anchor that keeps you grounded.

The Time Delay in Achieving Greatness

One of the biggest lessons from the Valley of Disappointment is understanding the time delay between effort and reward.

The bamboo tree is a classic example. After planting, it doesn’t show significant growth for years.

Then, suddenly, it can grow up to 90 feet in just a few weeks. This explosive growth is possible only because of the deep root system it built during its dormant years.

Similarly, your efforts are laying the groundwork for future success.

The time delay isn’t a sign of failure; it’s part of the process.

Each small action you take, each habit you reinforce, is like watering that bamboo tree.

Success may not be immediate, but it’s inevitable if you stay consistent.

Embracing the Journey

The Valley of Disappointment is challenging, but it’s also where resilience is forged.

Remember, progress isn’t always visible, but that doesn’t mean it’s not happening.

When you’re in the valley, trust the process, celebrate small wins, and keep taking consistent steps forward.

Eventually, you’ll look back and realize that the very valley you once resented was the foundation for your greatest growth.

So, if you’re feeling stuck, don’t despair. Keep showing up, keep watering the seed, and trust that your breakthrough is closer than you think.

As James Clear reminds us, “Habits are the compound interest of self-improvement.”

Small actions, repeated over time, lead to extraordinary results.

Yesterday was a tough day. I was so busy fixing a website issue that I couldn’t write the article I planned.

I had been taking the same steps to fix this problem for over two years, but yesterday, those steps failed.

That failure cost me over three hours. At the same time, I was hosting a Zoom call with leaders and regular forum attendees.

The experience taught me a powerful lesson—it’s not about the crisis; it’s about delivering results despite it.

This is the story of shifting from “can’t” to “can” and focusing on results.

The “Can’t” Mindset

The “can’t” mindset holds us back. It’s full of excuses and reasons why something won’t work.

For example:

• “I’m too busy.”
• “I’ve tried everything.”
• “It’s impossible with my current resources.”

Yesterday, I almost fell into this trap.

My to-do list was full. The website issue seemed unsolvable.

Hosting a Zoom call made me feel stretched too thin. If I had accepted these “can’t” thoughts, I wouldn’t have learned what I did.

Why Results Matter More Than Excuses

In life and work, results are what count. Nobody remembers your reasons for not delivering; they remember whether you delivered or not.

If I had focused on results early on, I could have worked on this article even while solving the website issue.

The real problem wasn’t my busy schedule—it was my mindset.

Shifting to the “Can” Mindset

The “can” mindset transforms obstacles into opportunities.

Here’s how to embrace it:

1. Focus on Solutions, Not Problems
   Instead of thinking, “I can’t write because I’m fixing a website,” think, “How can I write while fixing this?” Split the task. Delegate parts of it if possible.
2. Prioritize Results
   Results aren’t about perfection. They’re about impact. Could I have written this article in less time yesterday? Absolutely. By focusing on results, I could have delivered value despite the crisis.
3. Practice “Can Do” More
   Action creates momentum. Sometimes, it’s better to start imperfectly than to delay. Yesterday taught me that every step forward counts, even when things aren’t going smoothly.

Overcoming “Can’t” in Real-Time

Let’s break down how to practice “can do” more, even during challenges:

1. Acknowledge the Challenge
   It’s okay to feel stuck. Yesterday, I felt the pressure of fixing something that wasn’t working. But acknowledging it is the first step to overcoming it.
2. Ask Better Questions
   Shift from “Why is this happening?” to “What’s the simplest next step?” I could have asked myself, “What’s the shortest version of the article I can write now?”
3. Adjust, Don’t Stop
   Progress isn’t always linear. I could have written a draft in breaks between troubleshooting or dictated key points while on the Zoom call. Small steps compound over time.

Lessons Learned

The biggest takeaway from yesterday is this: results aren’t about waiting for perfect conditions.

They’re about moving forward despite imperfection. It’s about choosing “can” over “can’t” every time.

If I had focused on delivering results, I could have shared this lesson yesterday.

But I’m sharing it now, and that’s what counts. “Can” isn’t about doing it all.

It’s about doing what matters most.

Final Thoughts

Adopting a “can” mindset is a daily practice.

It’s about delivering results, learning from challenges, and moving forward.

Yesterday, I learned that even when things go wrong, we always have a choice: to stay stuck or to adapt.

So today, let’s choose “can.” Let’s focus on results.

And let’s practice “can do” more.

Have you ever tried to learn something new, like playing the guitar or understanding a tricky math problem, but felt stuck?

Maybe you kept thinking, Why is this so hard for me when others seem to pick it up so quickly?

The secret might lie in how you learn.

Everyone learns differently, and discovering your learning style is the key to unlocking faster learning.

The Three Main Learning Styles

Experts have identified three main ways people learn:

1. Words (Verbal Learners)
   • These people learn best through reading, writing, or listening to explanations.
   • If you’re a verbal learner, you probably enjoy reading books, taking notes, or listening to podcasts.
2. Visuals (Visual Learners)
   • Visual learners need to see things to understand them.
   • Charts, diagrams, pictures, and videos make learning easier for them.
   • If you’re a visual learner, you might prefer watching how something works rather than hearing about it.
3. Demos (Kinesthetic Learners)
   • Kinesthetic learners thrive when they can do things hands-on.
   • They learn by practicing, experimenting, or physically engaging with what they’re trying to learn.
   • If you’re this type of learner, sitting through long lectures might not be your thing.
   • You’d rather roll up your sleeves and dive in.

Why Does Knowing Your Style Matter?

Imagine trying to build a piece of furniture using only a list of written instructions (words), but you’re a visual learner who needs diagrams to make sense of it.

It would feel frustrating, right?

Understanding your learning style helps you:

• Save time by focusing on methods that work best for you.
• Stay motivated because the process feels natural and enjoyable.
• Retain information better since you’re learning in a way your brain prefers.

How to Discover Your Learning Style

Here are three simple steps to find out what works best for you:

1. Reflect on Past Experiences
   • Think about when you learned something quickly and easily.
   • Did you enjoy reading about it, watching videos, or doing it yourself?
   • That’s a big clue.
2. Experiment With All Three
   • Pick a simple task, like learning a new recipe. Read the instructions (words), watch a video tutorial (visuals), and try cooking step by step (demo). Which method felt easiest and most effective?
3. Ask for Feedback
   • Sometimes, friends or coworkers notice things about us that we overlook. They might say, “You always understand better when you watch a demo,” or “You’re great at remembering things after writing them down.” Their insights can guide you.

Blending Styles for Maximum Learning

While most people have a dominant learning style, blending methods can be even more powerful.

For example:

• If you’re a visual learner, add diagrams to your notes while reading.
• If you’re a kinesthetic learner, take notes while watching a video to reinforce the lesson.
• If you’re a verbal learner, explain what you’ve learned to someone else. Teaching is a great way to deepen your understanding.

Make Learning Fun and Personal

The most important part of learning faster is making it enjoyable.

Choose topics you’re genuinely curious about and match your learning method to your style.

Whether it’s mastering a new skill, studying for an exam, or just picking up a hobby, knowing how you learn can make the journey smoother and more fun.

Final Thoughts

Learning isn’t one-size-fits-all.

By understanding whether you learn best through words, visuals, or demos, you can customize your approach and see faster results.

So, the next time you’re stuck, pause and think: Am I using the best method for me?

Once you find your groove, there’s no limit to what you can achieve!

Have you ever wondered why some businesses thrive while others struggle to stay afloat?

The secret often lies in one key concept: value creation.

Whether you’re running a small shop, leading a team in a big company, or just thinking about starting a business, understanding value creation can make all the difference.

What is Value Creation?

At its core, value creation is about helping people solve problems or meet their needs in a way that makes their lives better.

It’s not about fancy marketing tricks or chasing profits—it’s about giving people something they truly care about.

For example, think about your favorite restaurant. You don’t just go there because they sell food.

You go because they offer something valuable: delicious meals, a cozy atmosphere, or friendly service.

That’s value creation in action.

Why Value Creation Matters

According to the book Your Personal MBA by Josh Kaufman, value creation is the foundation of every successful business.

Kaufman explains that a business exists to provide something useful to others.

If you don’t create value, there’s no reason for people to give you their time, money, or attention.

Here’s why value creation is so important:

1. It Attracts Customers: People are drawn to products and services that solve their problems or make their lives better. For example, if you sell a food supplement that boosts energy levels and improves health, you’re offering real value to people who struggle with fatigue.
2. It Builds Loyalty: When you consistently deliver value, people will keep coming back. They’ll trust you, recommend you to others, and become your biggest supporters.
3. It Drives Growth: Businesses that focus on value creation grow faster. When you solve meaningful problems, people are willing to pay for your solutions, and this fuels your success.

How to Create Value in Your Business

Creating value doesn’t have to be complicated. Here are some simple steps to get started:

1. Understand Your Audience: Who are you trying to help? What are their biggest challenges or needs? Talk to your customers, listen to their feedback, and learn what they care about.
2. Solve Real Problems: Focus on making life easier, better, or more enjoyable for your customers. For instance, if you’re running a network marketing business, you could provide health products that truly improve people’s well-being.
3. Deliver Quality: People value things that work well and last. Whether it’s a product, a service, or an experience, aim for high quality every time.
4. Make it Accessible: Even the best solutions won’t matter if they’re hard to get. Ensure your products are easy to find, affordable, and convenient to use.

Whether you’re creating a product, offering a service, or just starting your entrepreneurial journey, always ask yourself:

“How can I make someone’s life better today?”

By making value creation your priority, you’ll not only build a thriving business but also leave a lasting impact on the people you serve.

Running a business can be exciting, but it is also full of challenges.

Many small business owners in the Philippines dream of growing their businesses, but they often struggle with how to do it.

One of the best ways to achieve consistent growth is by having a system that is both doable and easy to duplicate.

What is a Doable and Duplicable System?

A doable system is simple and easy to follow. It breaks down tasks into manageable steps that anyone can understand.

A duplicable system can be easily repeated by others.

This allows your team or future partners to follow the same steps and get the same results.

Why is This System Important?

1. Saves Time A clear system helps you save time. Instead of figuring things out over and over, you follow the steps.
2. Reduces Mistakes When everyone knows exactly what to do, mistakes become less frequent. This leads to higher quality work.
3. Builds Consistency Customers appreciate consistency. A system ensures your product or service is always reliable.
4. Enables Growth You cannot grow your business alone. A system allows others to step in and help without needing constant guidance.
5. Empowers Your Team When you provide a simple system, your team feels more confident and capable. This boosts morale and productivity.

How to Create a Doable and Duplicable System

1. Start Small Focus on one part of your business first. For example, start with your most time-consuming task.
2. Write It Down Put the steps on paper or a digital file. Make it as clear as possible.
3. Test It Try following your system yourself. Make adjustments if it’s too hard to follow.
4. Train Others Teach your system to someone else. If they can do it, you know it works.
5. Improve Constantly Review your system regularly. As your business grows, you may need to update it.

The Power of Duplication

Without a system, every branch might do things differently.

But if you create a detailed guide for making drinks, training staff, and managing sales, your new branches can succeed just like the first one.

Final Thoughts

A highly doable and duplicable system is not just a tool; it is a foundation for success.

It allows you to save time, reduce stress, and grow your business faster.

For small business owners in the Philippines, it is the key to scaling up without losing quality.

Start building your system today, and watch your business thrive!

Rejection is a word that often brings discomfort.

Whether it’s not landing a job, losing a client, or facing criticism, rejection can make us feel disheartened.

However, what if I told you that rejection isn’t just a setback but an opportunity?

Handling rejection well can be one of the most valuable skills you develop for your career.

Rejection Builds Resilience

Resilience is the ability to bounce back from challenges.

For many Filipinos from low-income families, life is already filled with hardships, from financial struggles to limited opportunities.

Facing rejection can feel like another weight to carry, but every time you choose to move forward, you strengthen your resilience.

The more you practice bouncing back, the more confident and capable you become in handling future challenges.

Rejection can teach you that setbacks are temporary and that your determination to rise above them is what truly counts.

Rejection Teaches You to Reflect and Improve

Rejection often comes with lessons. Even if no feedback is provided, it’s essential to take a moment and reflect on what could have been done differently.

Did you lack certain skills? Could your approach have been more polished?

This process of reflection helps you grow and prepares you better for the next opportunity.

For young Filipinos, particularly those aiming for scholarships, jobs, or other life-changing opportunities, learning to reflect and improve is a crucial step toward success.

When you experience rejection, ask yourself:

• What can I learn from this experience?
• How can I better prepare next time?
• Are there skills or tools I need to develop?

The key is to focus on growth rather than dwelling on failure.

Rejection Reduces Fear of Failure

Many young people are paralyzed by the fear of failure.

They worry about what others might say or how it might affect their confidence.

However, experiencing rejection repeatedly teaches you that failure is not the end.

Each rejection becomes a stepping stone to building courage and reducing the fear of trying.

For Filipinos struggling with limited opportunities, the fear of taking risks—whether applying for a competitive program or starting a small business—can be overwhelming.

But rejection reminds you that trying and failing is better than not trying at all.

As mentioned in a previous article, life is about choosing your pain: the pain of taking action or the pain of staying stuck.

The pain of rejection is temporary, but the regret of not trying can last a lifetime.

Rejection Opens New Opportunities

Sometimes, rejection is life’s way of redirecting you to something better.

It may close one door but lead you to another that aligns better with your goals.

The key is to keep moving forward and remain open to possibilities.

Rejection encourages you to explore other paths, and often, these new paths bring unexpected success.

For example, if you are rejected from a job, it might push you to pursue further education, gain new skills, or discover an entirely new career that suits you better.

Staying persistent and open-minded allows you to see rejection as a stepping stone rather than a stumbling block.

Rejection Builds Empathy

When you face rejection, you gain a deeper understanding of how it feels to struggle and strive for something.

This builds empathy and makes you more compassionate towards others.

As you climb higher in your career, this empathy will help you connect with and inspire others who are also working hard to overcome challenges.

For younger Filipinos who dream of becoming leaders, teachers, or community advocates, this empathy is a powerful tool.

It allows you to support and guide others, creating a ripple effect of growth and positivity.

Practical Ways to Handle Rejection

1. Acknowledge Your Feelings: It’s natural to feel disappointed. Allow yourself to feel, but don’t dwell on it for too long.
2. Separate Rejection from Your Identity: Rejection doesn’t define your worth. It’s a part of life, not a reflection of who you are.
3. Seek Feedback: If possible, ask for feedback to understand areas where you can improve.
4. Reframe Rejection: Instead of seeing it as a failure, view it as a lesson. Ask yourself, “What can I learn from this?”
5. Keep Moving Forward: Don’t let rejection hold you back. Take the next step, no matter how small it may be. Progress is key.
6. Focus on What You Can Control: Work on developing your skills, building connections, and improving your mindset.
7. Find Inspiration: Look up to individuals who overcame rejections and went on to achieve great things. Let their stories motivate you.

Every successful person has faced rejection. What sets them apart is their ability to rise above it.

Choose your pain wisely—embrace the temporary pain of rejection and action rather than the lasting pain of regret.

With this mindset, you’ll find that rejection is not something to fear but a stepping stone to your dreams.